Grandpa,
When my wife passed away, I moved back to (The Fox River Valley) in order to be closer to my aging parents. I ended up moving in with them in order to help them with day to day chores. I am seeing changes in my mother that bother me. She is now cross with my father and uses some very profane language. In the past she had always been very positive and loving. Now she is bitter. She does not always recognize individuals or her surroundings.
I know that she has a mental disease. I tried to discuss it with her doctor, but my father is her legal and medical guardian and he has instructed the doctor to not discuss her case with me. I have tried to get him to sign her into a facility for those with her condition. He refuses. He keeps telling me that she is his wife, for better or for worse. He reminds me that when he had cancer, she did not abandon him. I believe that she would have a better quality of life in a facility. We are at odds over this issue.
Grandpa says: You talk about the quality of her life. What could be a better life than being tended by the man who loves her as much as your dad does? Being in a facility may extend her life, or it may not, but one thing is certain, separating them will kill your father. I can guarantee you that both will be much happier to stay together in their own home. Only one thing could make them both much happier; you need to get on board with your dad’s way of thinking and be more supportive of his choice to spend every possible minute with the woman who has devoted her life to him. They are still that deeply in love. That is a blessing to both of them. You need to appreciate and respect their choice to stay together. If your dad can see past your mother’s hurtful words, spawned by her disease, then why can’t you? You owe your dad an apology for disagreeing with him. That will go a long way toward reconciling your relationship with both of your parents.
Grandpa,
I went to visit my son at college. While there, I met his very good-looking friend. I am a widow and would like to start a relationship with this man. I have called this young man on a few occasions, but he is always too busy to talk. I send him small gifts, but never get a thank you call. I asked my son to bring him along when he comes home for Easter. He said he will not. I am beginning to wonder if the man is gay. If he is, how do I protect my son from him?
Grandpa says: Protect your son from a gay friend? You don’t know if he is gay. How about protect the friend from you? You are a sexual predator. You are stalking that young man. That is a crime. Leave him alone!
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