Grandpa,
Thank you for asking. A blessing I have for which I am grateful is my younger sister and our pen pal relationship across the miles.
Grandpa,
I am sick and tired of these Bible Beaters pushing their beliefs onto real people who live in a real world. My kids just got back from trick or treating. One house gave them a sermonette about Jesus, then handed them all a card with a prayer to a saint and a cross printed on it. No candy or treat of any sort. Just the religious message with the admonition that they must pray to this saint so they do not burn in hell for honoring the devil on Halloween. That is just going too far. It is terrorizing little children.
Grandpa says: You said they just got back and you called them “little children”. Are you telling me you sent little children out on Halloween with no escort? Be grateful that all they met was a religious zealot! Everyone has the freedom to express thoughts. You have the responsibility to be with your children to protect them from harm. If you cannot or will not make yourself available to their, how dare you get your nose bent out of shape over their meeting some real people who are exercising their real rights to freedom of expression? Now, why can you not sit down with your children and explain “religious tolerance”?
Grandpa,
When I first met my husband, I was intimidated by his mother. She was not mean, or anything, she just was so perfect, I was afraid to meet her. He gushed about what a great person she was. When I finally did meet her, I found that she was just a normal, fallible woman. Very pleasant, but not the saint he made her out to be. We always got along well. She been gone (a small number) of years. He no longer goes on about her saintliness. He rarely even mentions her or seems to miss her. It is as if she never even existed. He never goes to her grave. He took her picture off our stairwell wall. He won’t even talk with his family and reminisce about her, or his youth. I see no other such changes in him about any other topic.
Grandpa says: My guess would be that he is avoiding his feelings. You do not mention anything about his father. Does he? I don’t see it as any big issue. Either he misses her deeply and refuses to let himself mourn publicly, or all of his gushing while she was alive was not genuine. There could be thousands of reasons for his change in attitude. How long after her passing did he change? Was it suddenly or gradually? Only with long sessions of therapy can one determine the reason for his change. How old was he when you met him? How old was he when she passed away? It is possible that he has just matured out of the stage of seeing Mom as a goddess. Let it be!
Got something stuck in your craw? Ask Grandpa. Address your letters to Ask Grandpa c/o The Voice, PO Box 123, Aurora, IL 60507 or send an E-mail to askgrandpa@thevoice.us.