Grandpa says: Confidential to MLO: I understand your situation. Your family is, however, reaching out to you. Your true friends have your back. You are blessed. In so, you are a blessing to those around you. Keep your faith strong. Have a very Happy Birthday.
Grandpa,
My youngest sister is about 16 years my junior. I keep seeing ways that she is messing up her life. No, not drugs. It is men. She has not had a real relationship in her entire life. She keeps meeting men in bars or on the internet. She has four daughters by four different fathers. She admits she does not know for sure who the father of her oldest is. Never before has she come to me for money, or even to talk out her problems. Our mother used to bail her out financially while she was alive. Now that Mom is gone (sister) has been hitting up family for money. I am now considered the family cheap skate because I won’t hand over money to her. I offered to cover the cost of her finding and going to a counselor. She says that is not fair. No one else puts stipulations on her just because men treat her like garbage.
Grandpa says: Fair does not mean giving every one the same. Fair means giving each person what he or she needs. Maybe your sister needs tough love. It is your money she wants. You have the right and the responsibility to be a good steward of the gifts you have gotten. Humans are just like cats. She will keep coming back as long as she is getting what she wants by doing what she is doing. I will not determine whether you should hand over money or not. Only you can decide that. I will suggest you read Proverbs 30:15.
Grandpa,
I mow lawns and use my own mower and my gas. I give them a fair price and am good at what I do. I can only mow on weekends and afternoons because I go to Summer school. When I go to a door to collect my fee, I always let the customer know that the quoted price does not include the tip. I rarely get tips, so I have to ask for them. I get frustrated when people don’t give them to me. How can I say it better so that more people tip me?
Grandpa says: The word tips comes from an acronym: To insure prompt service. To request a tip after the service has been given is a bit backwards. You are an independent contractor, of sorts. You state a price and the consumer then expects to pay the quoted price. To get frustrated for getting what you ask for is insanity. If you want a customer to give you more money, then quote a higher price. What difference does it make to you whether you charge a dollar or you charge 80¢ and get a 20¢ tip? It all ads up to the same dollar. Be honest with your customers, and with yourself.
Got something stuck in your craw? Ask Grandpa. Address your letters to Ask Grandpa c/o The Voice, 314 N. Lake Street, Suite 2, Aurora, IL 60506 or send an E-mail to askgrandpa@thevoice.us.