The Chas must confess that he has not been very observant where chimneys are concerned. Contrary to what he wrote in his previous essay, there are chimneys facing the street; moreover, there are chimneys in the front of some houses. Sorry for the confusion.
Speaking of confusion, our resident UFO has intimated that I have been “cutesy” of late. I’ve been called a lot of things during my life, some of which cannot be printed in this family newspaper. But, ”cutesy”? Whatever did he mean by that? Is this the sort of language spoken in his universe? Inquiring minds want to know.
Our resident UFO person has claimed that I am “ignorant,” “stupid,” and “distractive.” He has claimed that I am full of “contemplations,” “hyperbole,” and “bullstuff” in an attempt to discredit him.
“Bullstuff”? Whatever did he mean by that? Is this yet another word in the language spoken in his universe? Goodness gracious me!
He has claimed that I cannot refute him. What’s to refute? He wallows in presumption, supposition, speculation, conjecture, dissimulation, allegation, rumors, and hear-say – none of which is admissible in a court of law. They may be admissible in his imaginary “court of law.” Or I should say in T. Rump’s imaginary “court of law,” because our UFO is simply reading from his master’s script. He treats the investigation into president Joe Biden’s activities as proven fact, which they are not, and hopes that everyone will believe him and exonerate his master.
He claims that any criticism from me or Wayne Johnson, or anyone else, is an attack against his so-called evidence and that I and Wayne and anyone else bash T. Rump in order to distract away from Biden’s supposed lawlessness. I submit that he bashes Biden in order to distract away from his master’s lawlessness and the many indictments T. Rump faces on Federal and state levels. Who is conducting a “witch hunt” now?
He might think that T. Rump is as pure as the driven snow, guiltless of any criminal activity. Hah! Every time this pathological liar opens his mouth, he commits another crime. The crime of slander.
Our UFO person is a parrot. He repeats everything he hears from T. Rump without bothering to check the veracity of his master’s – dare I say it? – “bullstuff” with independent sources.
In all fairness (an alien concept in MAGA circles), The Chas has his own concerns about Uncle Joe Biden. The president has spent his entire political career seeking compromises from the Republican Party in order to get legislation passed. Most of the time, he has sold the farm and what was left of the legislation has been vapid. As president, he has had to water down his signature pieces of legislation, because he did not have enough Democratic Party votes in the U.S. Senate to pass them and thus had to persuade “moderate” Republicans to come to his rescue. Then there are the “gifts” he has given to the extractive industries – more oil and gas drilling, more logging, more mining, more grazing of cattle — all on public lands.
The election of 2024: Biden or Trump? Neither one, folks. They should both be put out to pasture. Vote for the Green Parry candidate. Or, get really wild and vote for me as a write-in candidate!
Just a thought.
Oh, and before I forget: The Mother Ship is waiting for you, Bela boy. Don’t be late.