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I see MAGA loser why-is-everybody-always-pickin’-on-me Trump is threatening Armageddon will befall us if he’s arrested and charged with anything. Maybe something will fall, but only on him and that’s the mighty ball peen hammer of justice. So far not many of his followers have been stirred up enough to take steps to keep the hammer from winging down with a mighty blow. Rudy Giuliani is less doom and gloom. He said a Trump indictment merely will be the end of civilization, not the whole planet. I guess only approximately 20 simple Simons turned out for #45’s initial call to action.

• Something that could be helping to crumble the MAGA cookie of other red hats is the truck driving around Mar-a-Lago sporting billboards emblazoned with Tucker Carlson’s “I hate him passionately” quote for all to see. If Donald Trump ever would read anything, it would make him angry. I can’t say that Donny Dum-Dum is the brightest amoeba in the Paleozoic slime, but even he must know at some level that he brought all this on himself.

• Here’s a good one. A school principal in the Ron DeSantis welcome-to-the-1950s state of Florida was forced to resign by the school board for allowing students to view Michelangelo’s famous David statue during lessons on Renaissance Art. Apparently the school board and parents are concerned children might discover the majority of people in the past actually had reproductive organs. These individuals must think a statue with an unnaturally located fig leaf covering the offending body part is more appropriate. Daddy, why does that naked man have a leaf stuck on his naughty bits? How does he keep it on there? Staples? Super glue? Hydraulic cement? Ironically, Renaissance art classes are required to be taught by the school. Go figure.

• Speaking of reproductive organs, a woman in Idaho, fed up with all the idiotic book-banning, has filed a suit to have the Bible removed from Idaho schools due to all the tawdry, pornographic stories contained therein that shouldn’t be read by children. She went on to cite examples of actions between various biblical life forms that I dare not even mention here. Search out David and Bathsheba’s story as a starter if you’re interested. As with any self-righteous banning movement (Remember Prohibition in the 1920s and how well that worked?), it only creates more desire in sentient beings to see or sample the banned materials. At least one Barnes & Noble store set up a display of banned children’s books.. Once you’ve lived long enough, younger readers, you see examples of history repeating itself, thereby dashing your hopes for an informed, pleasant, future because society hasn’t learned from its mistakes.

More than two years after the January 6, 2021 assault on democracy, we now have the mother of all conspiracy propagandists Marjorie Taylor Greene and other GOP lug nuts doing their own rewrite of history by claiming the aforementioned event was just a walk in the park or as pleasant as a weekend in Bermuda. It’s more difficult for MTG and Company to do a hatchet job than it was for the characters in George Orwell’s 1984, because we have video evidence and the majority of us watched the event unfold on live TV. George’s characters only had to destroy written records and create alternates, then repeatedly tell citizens they were not correctly remembering the past.

I think it’s time for me to take leave of our increasingly Orwellian civilization by getting myself abducted by aliens. Can anyone up there in a nearby mother ship hear me? E.T.? Warf? Anybody? Beam me up. I’ll bring beer, okay? Anybody?

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