The Chas confesses that he is a firm believer in “Intelligent Design.”
But, before you leap out of your chair, dear reader, and wonder why Aurora’s “Great Godless Guru” has turned 180 degrees philosophically, read on. You’ll be greatly surprised/outraged.
What is “intelligent design?” you may ask. There was a big brouhaha when it was first promoted. Simply put, it rejects the evolutionary theories of Charles Darwin, explains the Genesis account of the creation of the human race with a lot of scientific gobble-de-gook, and proves that creation took place on a Saturday six thousand years ago, to be exact, at the design of a fellow named “God”, no last name, no business address, no phone number.
As creation myths go, the Genesis account is no more believable or true than the hundreds of other such tales. Every society/civilization has had its own version of how we hairless apes came into being. Yez pays yer money, and yez takes yer cherse, doncha know?
BTW, the Genesis account is not only a creation myth, it is a fable similar to the fables the ancient Greek writer Aesop used to write. Fables end with a statement of acceptable behavior. The fable in Genesis has to do with human sexuality. Adam and Eve ate the “fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil,” i.e. they had sex and were embarrassed.
But I digress.
Even the theory of evolution has a problem. There is a gap between homo habilis and homo sapiens which the anthropologists have been trying to fill by searching for a “missing link.” They have not yet found it, despite the number of bones they have dug up over two centuries. The Chas has concluded that the missing link can’t be found, because it doesn’t exist. The plain fact of the matter is that homo sapiens appeared on the world stage rather abruptly. How so? you may ask.
A third hypothesis exists which will answer the question. Unfortunately, 99.99% of the human race rejects this idea out of hand, because it sounds like a lot of science fiction. (On the other hand, much of our modern technology once was “science fiction,” so the nay-sayers ought to take a breath before speaking.)
The Chas has written a number of science fiction novels (uh, oh, a shameless plug coming up!). In one of his early works, The Seranane Construct, he posits a highly-advanced race of extraterrestrials who, while exploring the fringes of the Milky Way galaxy, encounter a little blue planet populated by primitive creatures who walk upon their hind legs. The explorers hit upon a brilliant idea; they will conduct a series of genetic-engineering experiments in order to determine if they can speed up the evolutionary process.
The project – code-named the “Seranane Construct” (after the chief scientist on board) – was a whopping success. But the finished product had this notion that they were created by a god who must be worshipped constantly. At one point, they were found to have sinned against him/her/it and therefore must seek salvation. Even though evolution was shortened by a million years (give or take a millennium or two), the newly-sentient creatures still retained some of their primitive behavior.
The Eskimos believe they came from the sky. What exactly does that mean? As a creation myth, it means exactly nothing. But, as a part of the third hypothesis, it means that the primitives were transported up to a space ship orbiting the Earth, geo-engineered, and returned to their homes.
Now, dear reader, which tale sounds more wholesome to you? A group of alien scientists conducting genetic experiments, or some god spitting on dirt, fashioning a mud sculpture, and kissing it in order to animate it? Think carefully before you answer.
Just a thought.