Category: Humor

Humor

Harmful toys to watch out for this holiday season

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Every year the World Against Toys Causing Harm, Inc. (W.A.T.C.H.) produces a list of the most dangerous kiddy toys available the upcoming Christmas season. The intention is to give diligent, concerned parents a purchasing guideline so they’ll be able to instruct Santa on which toys to bring that will keep...

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Feature Humor Opinion

Not again; here comes another four years

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“Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me,” or something along those lines. Hard to believe, but we’ll have convicted criminal sex abuser Dumbo Donald Trump to kick around again for four more years, with many of his cohorts and deviants at his side. He appears...

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Humor Opinion

Spooky time of year: Halloween and elections

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Boo! A glorious Happy Halloween to all you, The Voice readers. By the time the next issue of The Voice lands in your mailbox or wherever your issue normally lands, thousands of area children will be coming down from their trick-or-treat sugar high, the Great Pumpkin will have been nibbled...

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Humor Opinion Political

I wish I could unsee this, Wild Bill at it again

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Just when I thought it was safe to sit down and have a leisurely read of The Voice, what should assault my poor nearsighted eyes but a piece written by pseudo-contributor Bela “My Nose Keep Getting Longer” Suhayda. I took a Dramamine tablet and was able to read through his...

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Humor Opinion Political

It’s debatable, but not worth the effort

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Once again, it’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood. The sun is shining, the birds are singing, the stock market’s up, inflation, gas prices, Donald Trump’s poll numbers and the value of his Truth Social stock are down and dropping lower every day. The only things on the rise in...

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Humor Political

Shame: Trump disrespect for military veterans

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Getting right to the point, which I admit is a bit unusual for me, in a few of my past columns I’ve noted the disrespect that draft dodger and fat, orange, phony-bone-spurred marshmallow, Donald Trump has for veterans, especially those who gave their lives for America in wars and hostile...

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Feature Humor Military

Old military days: Missing 23rd engineers

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On or around military-related holidays, I like to write something military-themed. Because Memorial Day is universally accepted as a military-related holiday, I’ll have to skip over the fact-checking of Wild Bill Suhayda’s blather in a recent edition of The Voice to present my military-themed piece. I’m not worried, because there...

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Humor Opinion Political

Wild Bill lives up to his name, not truth

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Just when I thought it was safe to open my copy of The Voice and enjoy all the interesting, relevant printed information, up pops Donald Trump lap dog Wild Bill Suhayda, spitting, foaming at the mouth, and spinning at who knows how many r.p.m.s. such as Taz, Warner Bros. Tasmanian...

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Humor Political

On Trump Tower, other nefarious ways

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The name “Trump” seems to be plastered everywhere these days: on video screens, in print, and on radio talk shows. Whatever happened to DJT’s 2016 pronouncement that, “If I lose the election, you’ll never hear from me again.”? Just another fib in his ever-increasing collection of fibbery. Not meaning to...

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Feature Humor

On eclipse, shades, taxing taxes, and stuff

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Did all of you readers of The Voice get a good look at the eclipse without going blind? Hopefully, you all had your eclipse shades on when you watched and didn’t try to drive anywhere while wearing them…as if you could. The only thing you can see through them is...

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Commentary Humor Opinion Political

Oumu could be a space probe in orbit

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It looks as if we’ll no longer have to worry about the 2024 presidential election, or any elections for that matter. Oumuamua will make them all moot points. Yes, dear readers, the big cosmic hunk of doo-doo that entered our solar system first in 2017 has made a triumphant return...

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Humor Political

Thought disorder viewed as Trump problem

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I’m going to jump right in this week with a bit of Trump Tripe. I shouldn’t be calling it “tripe” because it’s true stuff, but the alliteration sounded nice. Attorney Dan Reiss wrote that 40 years ago, two men, partners in an electrical contracting company, came into his office and...

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Events Humor Opinion Political

Valentine’s Day love for Rudy, No. 45

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Nothing pays tribute to our two greatest presidents on Presidents Day, more than a good, old-fashion mattress sale. For any of you MAGAs out there, I’m referring to George and Honest Abe. We recently celebrated Valentine’s Day, the day dedicated to love. And if you and your special other had...

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Commentary Humor Opinion Political

Monitor needed for Wild Bill Suhayda prose

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Oh my lord, my lord. Just when I thought it was safe to go back in The Voice with a new fun topic, here comes Wild Bill Suhayda riding full speed ahead on his donkey and shooting his flaming arrows in my direction and that of Chas Coddington as well....

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Humor Political

Wild Bill incorrect on idea of Orange Man’s execution

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Are all you happy Voice readers enjoying the balmy weekend-in-Bermuda-type weather out there? When it’s –10° F with about six inches of snow on the ground, it’s not really the best time for spring planting unless your growing snowballs. So while I’m hunkered down inside, once again I feel I...

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Feature Humor

Chas announces run for office of president

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Dear reader, once again I am officially announcing my intent to run for the office of president of the United States in 2024. I have thought long and hard (about five minutes) concerning this decision, but I believe it is my civic duty to seek this office. I am making...

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Humor

New Year’s resolutions varied: Medical to monkeys

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Well? Have you made them? Have you broken them, yet? It’s already been three days. What are you waiting for? In case you’re more confused than I am, which hardly seems possible, I’m referring to New Year’s resolutions. It’s out with the old, in with the new, although it has...

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Humor

Santa’s liability in question with grandma’s accident

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‘Tis the season to be jolly, make merry, and sing, “Deck the Halls with Poison Ivy” and the like. But on a serious note, we need to remember why we celebrate Christmas in the first place. “Silent Night,” “Joy to the World,” and “Away in a Manger” seem to be...

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Feature Humor

U.S. Army personnel memories from Seoul, Korea

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As television minister Joel Osteen says, “I like to start off with something funny.” While watching the unfolding Trump family debacle, if you think you may have failed to do your best as a parent, consider this: Do you have individual courtroom sketches of yourself and of your children? If...

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Feature Humor

Story of pocket billiards with Willie Mosconi

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I have a very wide grin on my face (where else would I have it?) as I put this to paper. Congressional GOP nut job Gym Jordan is out as potential Speaker of the House. Donald Trump cronies are flipping on him like pancakes on an overheated IHOP griddle. Wait...

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